Quick, Funny Jokes!

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Auto-Racing, NASCAR, F1 Jokes

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Q: How can you tell when a NASCAR fan is watching a Formula One race?
A: When he taps you on the shoulder and asks "Are we watching qualifying?"

Q: What don't drivers eat before a big race?
A: In case they get indy-gestion.

Q: What is the difference between Tony Stewart’s car and a porcupine?
A: On a porcupine, the pricks are on the outside!

Q: Why did NASCAR outlaw the Polish victory lap?
A: Because it was interfering with Jeff Burton's ability of finish the race!

Q: What do Matt Kenseth fans use for Birth Control?
A: Their personalities.

Q: What do you call 1,000 Restrictor plates at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A Good Start.

Q: Why isn't NASCAR driver Jeremy Mayfield worried about reportedly testing positive for methamphetamines again?
A: Hollywood is calling and wants him to co-star in a sequel to "Speed Racer"

Q: What Does NASCAR Stand For?
A: Non-Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks

Q: What is the worst thing about 5 Jeff Gordon Fans going over a cliff in a Monte Carlo?
A: A Monte Carlo Seats 6

Q: What is Kevin Harvick's favorite color?
A: Caution Flag Yellow

Q: Why Do Rednecks Do It Doggy Style?
A: So They Can Both Watch The Race

Q: If Robert Pressley, John Andretti and Geoff Bodine were in a boat and the Boat Sinks, Who Would be saved?
A: Half the cars in Sundays Race.

Q: How can you tell when Mark Martin is going to say something intelligent?
A: He starts with "I once heard Tony Stewart say..."

Q: What do you call Michael Waltrip racing with his car tied to the back of Jeff Gordon's?
A: A true restrictor plate

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