Quick, Funny Jokes!

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British Jokes - England, UK

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Q: Why is no one late in London?
A: Because there is a big clock right in the middle of town.

Q: Why is England the wettest country?
A: Because the queen has reigned there for years!

Q: What's the difference between Princess Diana and Elton John?
A: Princess Diana never became a queen of England

Q: What do you call an English restaurant that only serves pancakes?
A: All Day Brexit

Q: Why did the American Siamese twins move to England?
A: So the other one could drive!

Q: How does every English joke start?
A: By looking over your shoulder.

Q: Why aren't the England football team allowed to own a dog?
A: Because they can't hold on to a lead.

Q: What do you call an Englishman in the knockout stages of the World Cup?
A: A Referee

Q: What does the Loch Ness monster eat?
A: Fish and ships

Q: What do you call a Scotsman with diarrhea?
A: Bravefart

Q: What time does Andy Murray got to bed?
A: Tennish

Q: What time was it when the monster ate the British prime minister?
A: Eight P.M.

Q: Whats the difference between Cinderella and the England football team?
A: Cinderella wanted to get to the ball

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